Most of y'all might not know that I also compose raps/songs for others. I do not create the music but I've been approached to come up with words that fir the music/beat.
This one here is called Pedro's Jam, written for Pedro.
P to tha E,
then add a D
R and a O,
Jus so ya know
It's me, the P.
Try to F, G?
Dunno,
I don't think so, ya see
My name is P, and I'm in the cut
Spend all day starin' at the butt
But now I ain't a pervert
No sexual harassment
The P knows how to do this
There ain't no embarassment
P stares, but it's just simple
Can it be all, like the Wu in the 9 nickle
From the place where it's legalized
No smokin' only smoke is from my oven, right
Cookin' beef and eatin' crab
Got it made, so I begin to gab
Tone it down, just like a radio
In my Quest, never listen to 102 Jamz yo
Who dat? Who dat? Who dat? Huh?
Change the station? Sup wit' dat, huh?
No rap or pop, just gospel for me
The P, no cuss words and profanity
Lend me an ear y'all, just listen
To the words that the P be preachin'
P to tha E,
then add a D
R and a O,
Jus so ya know
It's me, the P.
Try to F, G?
Dunno,
I don't think so, ya see (2x)
So P got a automatic, for the garage door
No one breakin' in, chillin on the floor
While I groove to the gospel hits
Praise the Lord, for the delicious fish
That we eat for dinner, along with rice
And beans, and beef, twice as nice
Thrice, like the strikes in baseball
But I'm not out, because I stand tall
Which my height be, the six foot three
Should've played ball, but that's not me
I got a Sega, play Live 95
I'm a point guard, with the juke and jive
Jive to juba, and juba and back
Tell my kids never smoke crack
I stack, like the sandwich
Meat on the bottom, ain't got no hitch
When I eat it, it's down the drain
Just what they say, no pain no gain
When it's flowin, just like the fluid
The P starts to rhyme, let's do it
P to tha E,
then add a D
R and a O,
Jus so ya know
It's me, the P.
Try to F, G?
Dunno,
I don't think so, ya see (2x)
People make the world go round
The P got those loaded in the mound
Just like the ants, or a pitcher
Filled with water, from the teacher
That try to front, so we do battle
The fool think, that he can tattle
On me, because I'm the OG
Original gangster, with the gun see
But just a super soaker, not the real deal
No violence, just wanna eat my meal
Which is good, beef and chicken
We are the world, we are the children
Hit the new mall get more shirts
P layin' low, checkin out the skirts
Huwebes, Mayo 29, 2008
The Doctors
Aside from the ex militarys, the doctors and their families have been in Orlando for quite some time too, since the 60's or so, even pre-dating Disney. These people are not only rich, they also got a lot of associates and extended network around the state.
They have several associations, for example, PMA, but they also have respective cliques and divisions within their group. Doctors have huge egos and it is not common to see them have beef and maintain grudges with one another.
You can tell if their a doctor or a doctor family member of course with the way they dress and their rides. Doctors prefer Mercedes Benzes and SUV's, and they generally have beachside condominiums in the Atlantic Ocean.
Now these are what I would call the old-skool group of doctors.
There are new doctors now which I actually classify as good old Filipino families. I would say that these old doctors are dwindling fast since they are all senior citizens now and even though their children are also most likely working in the same profession, they are not the same since their part of the new breed.
They have several associations, for example, PMA, but they also have respective cliques and divisions within their group. Doctors have huge egos and it is not common to see them have beef and maintain grudges with one another.
You can tell if their a doctor or a doctor family member of course with the way they dress and their rides. Doctors prefer Mercedes Benzes and SUV's, and they generally have beachside condominiums in the Atlantic Ocean.
Now these are what I would call the old-skool group of doctors.
There are new doctors now which I actually classify as good old Filipino families. I would say that these old doctors are dwindling fast since they are all senior citizens now and even though their children are also most likely working in the same profession, they are not the same since their part of the new breed.
Miyerkules, Mayo 28, 2008
Can We Have Some Real Ballers In Here
On Saturday May 31, there will be an official post-Festival of Faith picnic to be held at some park, in the Dr. Phillips area. Usually when they hold these events they choose a park that has a basketball court and they take up a spot close to it.
This picnic is no exception. The flyer said it will be an area near the basketball court!
Which means there is definitely gonna be basketball involved, weather permitting, of course. We're gonna see if there are priests that can ball and if they don't ball, maybe others will.
I went to one of the Flip picnics before and let me just say the amount of braggadocio outnumbered even an NBA all star game. My goodness, lots of wannabe ballers!
Sure, I did my share of balling, and was on the winning team several times so I didn't have to worry about getting picked, but for the other people who didn't get picked, they'll act so bitter and act like they deserve to be picked!
I guess they think they are entitled.
Imagine their face, it's like Kendrick Perkins of the Celtics after foul call.
If you can't ball, just play NBA Live. I suggest NBA Live 95.
This picnic is no exception. The flyer said it will be an area near the basketball court!
Which means there is definitely gonna be basketball involved, weather permitting, of course. We're gonna see if there are priests that can ball and if they don't ball, maybe others will.
I went to one of the Flip picnics before and let me just say the amount of braggadocio outnumbered even an NBA all star game. My goodness, lots of wannabe ballers!
Sure, I did my share of balling, and was on the winning team several times so I didn't have to worry about getting picked, but for the other people who didn't get picked, they'll act so bitter and act like they deserve to be picked!
I guess they think they are entitled.
Imagine their face, it's like Kendrick Perkins of the Celtics after foul call.
If you can't ball, just play NBA Live. I suggest NBA Live 95.
Martes, Mayo 27, 2008
The Rise Of The G.O.F.F.'s
Back in the day, most of the Pinoy familias living here are either doctors or former military. Nowadays, their numbers have been dwindling, as they are no longer in the union (as in, dead) and there doesn't seem to be new transplants from other states here that fit that criteria.
So, in the style of Paul Porter - Ladies and gentlemen, here come the G.O.F.F.'s!
What is G.O.F.F.? It stands for "Good Old Filipino Family." This phrase was coined by a Flip friend of mine from high school. Since the first Flips I knew were military kids, I asked him if he was also a military kid and he answered with an empathic "hell, no!" and said he came from a good old Filipino family.
I told him, I'm under the same classification!
During the high school era, there have been very few G.O.F.F.'s here in town, and then a few years after that, when my brother and sister entered high school, those numbers multiplied until they took over the town.
G.O.F.F.'s have increased in such a way, that you have to group them under sub-classifications. There are FOB's (straight outta Pinas), people from the North who move down here for either job or weather reasons, working visa people like nurses, engineers, and lately, priests, and of course, the infamous TNT's who marry legal Pinoys in order to be naturalized.
Every Pinoy event I go to here seems to be full of the G.O.F.F.'s and that's not a bad thing. I mean, after all I am part of one.
However, and I don't mean to feather no ruffle, G.O.F.F.'s tend to be maingay and magulo, especially during large gatherings, like salo salo and things like that.
They like to singit in the lines, and also make a lot of noise, something that just did not exist back then before the G.O.F.F. era. Just a whole bunch of craziness. Last Sunday when I was at the HKB there was a party there and the place was as loud as a palengke!
Don't be mad, I'm only being real!
So, in the style of Paul Porter - Ladies and gentlemen, here come the G.O.F.F.'s!
What is G.O.F.F.? It stands for "Good Old Filipino Family." This phrase was coined by a Flip friend of mine from high school. Since the first Flips I knew were military kids, I asked him if he was also a military kid and he answered with an empathic "hell, no!" and said he came from a good old Filipino family.
I told him, I'm under the same classification!
During the high school era, there have been very few G.O.F.F.'s here in town, and then a few years after that, when my brother and sister entered high school, those numbers multiplied until they took over the town.
G.O.F.F.'s have increased in such a way, that you have to group them under sub-classifications. There are FOB's (straight outta Pinas), people from the North who move down here for either job or weather reasons, working visa people like nurses, engineers, and lately, priests, and of course, the infamous TNT's who marry legal Pinoys in order to be naturalized.
Every Pinoy event I go to here seems to be full of the G.O.F.F.'s and that's not a bad thing. I mean, after all I am part of one.
However, and I don't mean to feather no ruffle, G.O.F.F.'s tend to be maingay and magulo, especially during large gatherings, like salo salo and things like that.
They like to singit in the lines, and also make a lot of noise, something that just did not exist back then before the G.O.F.F. era. Just a whole bunch of craziness. Last Sunday when I was at the HKB there was a party there and the place was as loud as a palengke!
Don't be mad, I'm only being real!
Lunes, Mayo 26, 2008
The Bandwagoneer
During an extremely noisy lunch at the HKB yesterday, I found out that one of the priests here, who shall rename nameless, is a bandwagoneer.
He is now a Celtics fan.
Lame-o, and mucho pathetico.
He is now a Celtics fan.
Lame-o, and mucho pathetico.
Linggo, Mayo 25, 2008
A Fat Bastard
So today, after dropping off the parents at the O.I.A., I stopped by the damn green Wal-Mart to get some water. Got the water and noticed there were only two open registers. This was at 8:30 am!
Ok, so I went to this line where a fat bastard porker beeotch was purchasing a shitload of items.
The lady rang up this bastard and all of a sudden, bastard leaves. She said she wanted to get one of those foil pan thingies for baking. After about a minute the beeotch comes back, and tells the register lady that she couldn't find it, and if she can look for it and bring her one.
I was already getting impatient. Register lady comes back and brings the pan thingie, and the bastard asks how much it costs. She told the lady to go ahead and ring it up.
Beeotch whipped out her personal checks and I got more pissed. Here we go again, I'm always stuck behind these slow-asses or personal check users. What the hell this ain't the 70's! Use your gawd damn debit card!
Then the bastard realized she does not have enough funds, as the grocery bill came up to about $80. She then brings out her credit card, and it gets declined.
I'm like, what the hell, and immediately headed for the other register as there was an opening. Paid for my shiat, and at the same time saw the fat bastard leave without her groceries since she cannot pay for them. The register lady was so pissed, she had already bagged those, and she had to bring them back to the go-backs section.
What a porker, and an idiot. Screw those people.
Ok, so I went to this line where a fat bastard porker beeotch was purchasing a shitload of items.
The lady rang up this bastard and all of a sudden, bastard leaves. She said she wanted to get one of those foil pan thingies for baking. After about a minute the beeotch comes back, and tells the register lady that she couldn't find it, and if she can look for it and bring her one.
I was already getting impatient. Register lady comes back and brings the pan thingie, and the bastard asks how much it costs. She told the lady to go ahead and ring it up.
Beeotch whipped out her personal checks and I got more pissed. Here we go again, I'm always stuck behind these slow-asses or personal check users. What the hell this ain't the 70's! Use your gawd damn debit card!
Then the bastard realized she does not have enough funds, as the grocery bill came up to about $80. She then brings out her credit card, and it gets declined.
I'm like, what the hell, and immediately headed for the other register as there was an opening. Paid for my shiat, and at the same time saw the fat bastard leave without her groceries since she cannot pay for them. The register lady was so pissed, she had already bagged those, and she had to bring them back to the go-backs section.
What a porker, and an idiot. Screw those people.
Sabado, Mayo 24, 2008
Dumb Asses at the McDonald's
So something crept into my brain and I ate a quick snack at McDonald's. I sat in front of the plasma so I can watch the news.
As I was eating, some stupid-ass white kid approached my damn table and asked if I had a couple of bucks he can bum, so he can get something to eat.
I'm like, what the fuck. I was already done anyway, so I bolted.
Stupid kid. Ask your mom, or some shit like that. Dumbass.
As I was eating, some stupid-ass white kid approached my damn table and asked if I had a couple of bucks he can bum, so he can get something to eat.
I'm like, what the fuck. I was already done anyway, so I bolted.
Stupid kid. Ask your mom, or some shit like that. Dumbass.
Huwebes, Mayo 22, 2008
Female Versions Of The Bubbalou's
Heading back to my desk today I noticed another oddity (which there is an abundance of in here, by the way) that made me laugh so hard I almost snorted the drink I was ingesting at the time.
I saw three porkers that resembled the Bubbalou's Bodacious BBQ logo!!
The funny thing is that they also got the shades goin' on, and they were in order from fat, fatter, to fattest!!!
God damn what a bunch of weird fat-asses!
I saw three porkers that resembled the Bubbalou's Bodacious BBQ logo!!
The funny thing is that they also got the shades goin' on, and they were in order from fat, fatter, to fattest!!!
God damn what a bunch of weird fat-asses!
Kyla-style Song
This is a parody of a Kyla song "Not Your Ordinary Girl" which was performed by Kyla and some poseur. Feel free to play the song and sing along, if you want.
Yo my name is Phat, and I ain't no damn Mexican
I'm a real Flip, bitch, and I ain't sayin' dis again
Well, you be a Mexican, and I knew it for awhile
I only dig Flips, La Raza ain't my style
Bitch, get over yourself
What the hell you yakkin' about
Why you think I'm Mexican?
Well you ain't no Flip, man!
I ain't Mexican, can't you see in my face
I'm Puerto Rican, I'm changin' my race
Why you playin' switcheroo, why don't cha just fall
It's you I'm gonna forget, and I ain't gon' let
I know you ain't trust me now, but I'm Rican like Arroyo
Not Mexican, not Flip, I wanna dance with you, yo
Funk it, ignore me, and you'll realize
I'm multi racial and I'm larger than a average guy
Baby I, ain't down with Fil-Sham
Only dig the real Flips
Make sure that I ain't flirtin'
Wit' no phonies, gotta watch my back from them suckaz
And I'm the kind of lady
That ain't gon' be doin' them thangs
Not gonna get with those fools
That's who I be and what I be for life
Yo well, I ain't tryin' to hide the fact that I'm Rican, knowhumsayin'
Well, step off me then, you're way way taller than me, anyway
Go ahead, leave me alone, I'm a chill now
Well, recognize bitch, I'm taller and I can dance
I don't care, fool, I had enough of your shit
I think we should dance on the court
Even though I'm way taller than you
COme on let's do this and look awkward
I'm a Rican, not like you
Okay well let's get to the court and dance
Cool
Step to the left and step to the right
I look like a fool, but you cool, so let's go
REPEAT CHORUS
Yo my name is Phat, and I ain't no damn Mexican
I'm a real Flip, bitch, and I ain't sayin' dis again
Well, you be a Mexican, and I knew it for awhile
I only dig Flips, La Raza ain't my style
Bitch, get over yourself
What the hell you yakkin' about
Why you think I'm Mexican?
Well you ain't no Flip, man!
I ain't Mexican, can't you see in my face
I'm Puerto Rican, I'm changin' my race
Why you playin' switcheroo, why don't cha just fall
It's you I'm gonna forget, and I ain't gon' let
I know you ain't trust me now, but I'm Rican like Arroyo
Not Mexican, not Flip, I wanna dance with you, yo
Funk it, ignore me, and you'll realize
I'm multi racial and I'm larger than a average guy
Baby I, ain't down with Fil-Sham
Only dig the real Flips
Make sure that I ain't flirtin'
Wit' no phonies, gotta watch my back from them suckaz
And I'm the kind of lady
That ain't gon' be doin' them thangs
Not gonna get with those fools
That's who I be and what I be for life
Yo well, I ain't tryin' to hide the fact that I'm Rican, knowhumsayin'
Well, step off me then, you're way way taller than me, anyway
Go ahead, leave me alone, I'm a chill now
Well, recognize bitch, I'm taller and I can dance
I don't care, fool, I had enough of your shit
I think we should dance on the court
Even though I'm way taller than you
COme on let's do this and look awkward
I'm a Rican, not like you
Okay well let's get to the court and dance
Cool
Step to the left and step to the right
I look like a fool, but you cool, so let's go
REPEAT CHORUS
Bagoong and Skyflakes
Filipinos like to eat weird food, but they take it one step further, by concocting these weird combinations. By combining one weird food with a normal food, it becomes weirder!
Take for example, the bagoong and skyflakes. Bagoong is this weird, anchovy paste, very salty, and pink or kinda brown in appearance. Skyflakes is kinda like a soda cracker but a little saltier with a aftertaste that is hard to describe.
Instead of putting jelly or spreadable fruit or whatever, some people put bagoong on the Skyflakes and eat it!
Another weird combination would be coffee poured over rice. And yeah, Reno and mayonnaise in pan de sal. Yick!
Take for example, the bagoong and skyflakes. Bagoong is this weird, anchovy paste, very salty, and pink or kinda brown in appearance. Skyflakes is kinda like a soda cracker but a little saltier with a aftertaste that is hard to describe.
Instead of putting jelly or spreadable fruit or whatever, some people put bagoong on the Skyflakes and eat it!
Another weird combination would be coffee poured over rice. And yeah, Reno and mayonnaise in pan de sal. Yick!
The "G" Rap
This rap is based on "G" a former co-worker:
yo my name g, i think you know dat
i roll with the e, people call me fat
which i be cuz i eat use the tray
when food was free, i get fourths, yay
sometimes fifth, just like a king
i chill but usually its heat i bring
lemme tell ya about a situation
rollin in the ride, havin conversation
on my yellow razr like sharapova
yakkin non stop when i see a impala
i swerve but it still hit me
my ride got wreck, but i'm alive, see
got broken joints, in a hospital stay
now back to the job, to get my pay
ain't got no ride so i take the bike
lance armstrong i ain't, but i'm fit, right
yea, bike home one night and got hit
from behind by a ride, sup wit dat hits
hit and run, so i sprawl on the street
got up and walked, i really felt beat
tossed the bike, and began to stride
all of a sudden someone offer me a ride
which the g accepted, opened the door
entered, and sat, the driver said let's go
little did i know, about to get jack
why this happen to me, that's just wack
my wallet got taken but i aint dead
tossed me to the side, bang my head
on the road, but no gobbets of brain
as i got up it started to rain, what a pain
in the backside, or better yet call it ass
can't wait to get home, come full blast
like supersoaker, in honor of the worker
that i eat wit, for sure, not a lurker
go to the casino one day, I be gamblin'
then sit on a table, doin' my eatin'
all you can eat, hard boiled eggs
i get ten of those, starin' at the legs
of the marilyn monroe wannabe, singin'
but not in the rain like kelly, i fill my belly
with the free food, nachos with greasy beef
free coke and sprite, it's just like the reef
in the theme park i hang out at every sunday
night, and then i do the take flight
read my rights, but not getting arrested
the g got the years, call it fully vested
bulletproof like superman can't be shot
got me the brand new ride and it's hot
i race, i drift, but not fast and furious
it's the blue neon, and people curious
to see if the g drive slow, to a crawl
i say hell no i drive it real fast, y'all
got the big sobe, and the gatorade rain
when I chill in the cut to stop the pain
that i got when i got bruised back then
ain't happnin' no mo, and the g is in
all in, like the tiles, arrange it like tetris
g take the day off, chill like atlantis
time to play golf, go to eastwood
see people playin' there and they no good
got my equipment from target, not big lots
i hit the links and I quit after two shots
hit the clubhouse for some lunch
order everythang on the menu, and some punch
which i drink but it ain't gatorade
so after gobbling up my meal i went to the shade
where my neon be parked at, drove to the gas
got the gatorade rain and my ac full blast
realy hot weather perfect for the beach
so i drive to cocoa, head for the streets
no beach towel, should i shoplift
of course, i do, go to the five and dime
but i realized i don't need to commit a crime
once again, the "g" is mackadocious
rollin' wit' the gatorade, atrocious
flavor call it rain like the weather
but not a merchant, like natalie
the g is just a casualty
of people getting placed in other queues
ain't down with this, i should refuse
to engage in this but need to get paid
in the weekend go to cocoa, get laid
and gamble in the sterling, and sun cruz
the "g" once wore them county blues
but only for a misdemeanor
you best believe, i'm the superior
just like the lake up north
where i'm from, back and forth
front, back, side to side, like a line dance
i'm hangin' wit' the other g's
and lookin' for the romance
hope to get with the other worker
which I dig, but not like a gravedigger
my ride is awesome, the blue neon
saw a FSU jersey in oviedo, a deion
sanders number 2, but I'm no. 1
it's 8 o clock now time to have fun
get to my favorite joint, call it target
and get me some ales, from the market
ain't no clearly canadian, it's real
gettin' drunk from it so what's the deal
with people who poke fun at my drink
don't need to raise no stink, and sink
to that level, which is low right now
don't force me to make my gat go bl-ow
no gumbo with okra for me, it's sick
so sirloin burger i get thirds, so thick
but here's a trick put one in the bun
the other two below, so i don't spend
a ton, it's camouflaged, container is black
so I eat three and don't get no flak
from the people I eat with, it's cool
used to be free, and that really rule
but i got dough anyways, so i spend
never save it for a rainy day, and then
I gamble of course, never a jackpot
stay clear of stores just like a big lot
which I ain't down, paint the face
like a clown, call it bozo, i froze yo
when it's cold, i use the space heater
straight out of goodwill, follow the leader
like playing trains in the basement
see those haters I toss em in the pavement
laugh out loud, or better yet cackle
when "g" attack it's just like a tackle
from lawrence taylor, and i'm a major
not minor like nbdl, so what the hell
you talkin' 'bout talkin' down to the "g"
it never cease to amaze me
how some act like this, people dis
and I let it go out the other ear, it miss
my auditory canal, and my sound waves
transformers from the 80's with the tapes
one day left the billfold in the desk
i stress but it's cool cuz nobody mess
wit' dat, or else g rearrange the face
get resconstructive like the man rudy t
in the good old 7-0, that's who you be
then i see someone take it, and all my cash
so i dash, in time to see the fool stash
my money in the fridge for some reason
so i snatched it, just like a treason
spent it right away bought more ales
it's too much i weight it on the scales
more than a hundred like the food i ate
i want the 4-0 go to the next state
but all they got is 36's not enough
why the hell are they makin' it tough
for the g to get the formula, the brew
best decide on what i gotta do
get outta this zoo, call it sanford
on the web saw disney tickets, not bradford
cove, i don't represent the thug
should i get magic kingdom and a new mug
which I do, get a ticket, hit the theme park
maybe get the worker with me, light a spark
but not a firework from the fourth of july
neon headed to disney world, and that's why
i act like this, because of the mouse
watch disney channel when i be in the house
now, it's all good, ridin' the teacups
after eatin' ten burgers, but no throw-ups
haunted mansion time, maybe i can let loose
thinkin' of the worker, hell i got the fuse
doombuggy broke down and i'm strokin'
use the mickey ice cream wrapper, and wipin'
the evidence, just like insurability
ride starts again, are they out to get me
don't think so cuz the g slick
wake up in the morning and shave with bic
time to get the trick, exit sex tampa bay
i see one, say hey, like willie may
but it cost too much so i gotta beg
dancin' on the road, and hurtin' my leg
now it's all bout the thirst and quench it
gatorade is where it's at, and drink it
i want purple, just like lakers
the team i root for, so no haters
allowed, get loud, get wild, and proud
like the family, or better yet the riverboat
just chillin' with the sobe in the flask
see the white board and it list the task
that needed to be done and it says shop
look for clothes, bigger than hip-hop
use the net, but i wanna go to thrift co.
people poke fun, and i just say hell no
yo my name g, i think you know dat
i roll with the e, people call me fat
which i be cuz i eat use the tray
when food was free, i get fourths, yay
sometimes fifth, just like a king
i chill but usually its heat i bring
lemme tell ya about a situation
rollin in the ride, havin conversation
on my yellow razr like sharapova
yakkin non stop when i see a impala
i swerve but it still hit me
my ride got wreck, but i'm alive, see
got broken joints, in a hospital stay
now back to the job, to get my pay
ain't got no ride so i take the bike
lance armstrong i ain't, but i'm fit, right
yea, bike home one night and got hit
from behind by a ride, sup wit dat hits
hit and run, so i sprawl on the street
got up and walked, i really felt beat
tossed the bike, and began to stride
all of a sudden someone offer me a ride
which the g accepted, opened the door
entered, and sat, the driver said let's go
little did i know, about to get jack
why this happen to me, that's just wack
my wallet got taken but i aint dead
tossed me to the side, bang my head
on the road, but no gobbets of brain
as i got up it started to rain, what a pain
in the backside, or better yet call it ass
can't wait to get home, come full blast
like supersoaker, in honor of the worker
that i eat wit, for sure, not a lurker
go to the casino one day, I be gamblin'
then sit on a table, doin' my eatin'
all you can eat, hard boiled eggs
i get ten of those, starin' at the legs
of the marilyn monroe wannabe, singin'
but not in the rain like kelly, i fill my belly
with the free food, nachos with greasy beef
free coke and sprite, it's just like the reef
in the theme park i hang out at every sunday
night, and then i do the take flight
read my rights, but not getting arrested
the g got the years, call it fully vested
bulletproof like superman can't be shot
got me the brand new ride and it's hot
i race, i drift, but not fast and furious
it's the blue neon, and people curious
to see if the g drive slow, to a crawl
i say hell no i drive it real fast, y'all
got the big sobe, and the gatorade rain
when I chill in the cut to stop the pain
that i got when i got bruised back then
ain't happnin' no mo, and the g is in
all in, like the tiles, arrange it like tetris
g take the day off, chill like atlantis
time to play golf, go to eastwood
see people playin' there and they no good
got my equipment from target, not big lots
i hit the links and I quit after two shots
hit the clubhouse for some lunch
order everythang on the menu, and some punch
which i drink but it ain't gatorade
so after gobbling up my meal i went to the shade
where my neon be parked at, drove to the gas
got the gatorade rain and my ac full blast
realy hot weather perfect for the beach
so i drive to cocoa, head for the streets
no beach towel, should i shoplift
of course, i do, go to the five and dime
but i realized i don't need to commit a crime
once again, the "g" is mackadocious
rollin' wit' the gatorade, atrocious
flavor call it rain like the weather
but not a merchant, like natalie
the g is just a casualty
of people getting placed in other queues
ain't down with this, i should refuse
to engage in this but need to get paid
in the weekend go to cocoa, get laid
and gamble in the sterling, and sun cruz
the "g" once wore them county blues
but only for a misdemeanor
you best believe, i'm the superior
just like the lake up north
where i'm from, back and forth
front, back, side to side, like a line dance
i'm hangin' wit' the other g's
and lookin' for the romance
hope to get with the other worker
which I dig, but not like a gravedigger
my ride is awesome, the blue neon
saw a FSU jersey in oviedo, a deion
sanders number 2, but I'm no. 1
it's 8 o clock now time to have fun
get to my favorite joint, call it target
and get me some ales, from the market
ain't no clearly canadian, it's real
gettin' drunk from it so what's the deal
with people who poke fun at my drink
don't need to raise no stink, and sink
to that level, which is low right now
don't force me to make my gat go bl-ow
no gumbo with okra for me, it's sick
so sirloin burger i get thirds, so thick
but here's a trick put one in the bun
the other two below, so i don't spend
a ton, it's camouflaged, container is black
so I eat three and don't get no flak
from the people I eat with, it's cool
used to be free, and that really rule
but i got dough anyways, so i spend
never save it for a rainy day, and then
I gamble of course, never a jackpot
stay clear of stores just like a big lot
which I ain't down, paint the face
like a clown, call it bozo, i froze yo
when it's cold, i use the space heater
straight out of goodwill, follow the leader
like playing trains in the basement
see those haters I toss em in the pavement
laugh out loud, or better yet cackle
when "g" attack it's just like a tackle
from lawrence taylor, and i'm a major
not minor like nbdl, so what the hell
you talkin' 'bout talkin' down to the "g"
it never cease to amaze me
how some act like this, people dis
and I let it go out the other ear, it miss
my auditory canal, and my sound waves
transformers from the 80's with the tapes
one day left the billfold in the desk
i stress but it's cool cuz nobody mess
wit' dat, or else g rearrange the face
get resconstructive like the man rudy t
in the good old 7-0, that's who you be
then i see someone take it, and all my cash
so i dash, in time to see the fool stash
my money in the fridge for some reason
so i snatched it, just like a treason
spent it right away bought more ales
it's too much i weight it on the scales
more than a hundred like the food i ate
i want the 4-0 go to the next state
but all they got is 36's not enough
why the hell are they makin' it tough
for the g to get the formula, the brew
best decide on what i gotta do
get outta this zoo, call it sanford
on the web saw disney tickets, not bradford
cove, i don't represent the thug
should i get magic kingdom and a new mug
which I do, get a ticket, hit the theme park
maybe get the worker with me, light a spark
but not a firework from the fourth of july
neon headed to disney world, and that's why
i act like this, because of the mouse
watch disney channel when i be in the house
now, it's all good, ridin' the teacups
after eatin' ten burgers, but no throw-ups
haunted mansion time, maybe i can let loose
thinkin' of the worker, hell i got the fuse
doombuggy broke down and i'm strokin'
use the mickey ice cream wrapper, and wipin'
the evidence, just like insurability
ride starts again, are they out to get me
don't think so cuz the g slick
wake up in the morning and shave with bic
time to get the trick, exit sex tampa bay
i see one, say hey, like willie may
but it cost too much so i gotta beg
dancin' on the road, and hurtin' my leg
now it's all bout the thirst and quench it
gatorade is where it's at, and drink it
i want purple, just like lakers
the team i root for, so no haters
allowed, get loud, get wild, and proud
like the family, or better yet the riverboat
just chillin' with the sobe in the flask
see the white board and it list the task
that needed to be done and it says shop
look for clothes, bigger than hip-hop
use the net, but i wanna go to thrift co.
people poke fun, and i just say hell no
Tito The Fool
Back then there was a dude here, name Tito. Tito swore up and down that one of these days, he will lay off the beef and eat a salad diet.
One day they started serving these Ceaser salads. Tito of course was delighted.
"Yo, they got these salads. They good. I'm officially on my salad diet now," he said.
I asked how many he ate.
"I had ten of those suckas!"
What a moron!
One day they started serving these Ceaser salads. Tito of course was delighted.
"Yo, they got these salads. They good. I'm officially on my salad diet now," he said.
I asked how many he ate.
"I had ten of those suckas!"
What a moron!
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